Wednesday, February 25, 2009

SHAKESPEARE FOUND GUILTY

Rhyme Scheme Investigators, after a 392 year investigation, declared that William (The Bard) Shakespeare, was the undisputed Corleone of organized rhyme. The primary evidence consisted of 154 sonnets. Shakespeare's poetic power was so overwhelming that his rhyme schemantra of ABAB CDCD EFEF GG came to bear his name and subsequently dominated over all other sonnet rhyme schemes.

Shakespeare attempted to keep his sonnets within a private readership, however, two sonnets were leaked in 1599 and published in The Passionate Pilgrim. The earliest mention of Shakespeare's sonnets came from Francis Meres in 1598 when he asserted that Shakespeare had "sugred Sonnets among his private friends". (Source: Honan, Park (1998), Shakespeare: A Life, Oxford: Oxford University Press, ISBN 0198117922 .) Investigators found over the centuries that poetry circles and triangles have been praising the Sonnets as a profound meditation on the nature of love, sexual passion, procreation, death, and time.

The Last Interim Report of the Commission On the Causes and Manifestations of Divergent Think Procedure Concerning the Apoetheosis of Organized Rhyme Throughout the Anglosphere concluded that William (The Bard) Shakespeare is head and shoulders above all other diversities of organized rhyme. This case is considered closed.